Awakening to Golf; Unveiling Your Inner Power for Lower Scores
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Its all in the planning. When I was getting married, I tried to keep it simple, and recommended inexpensive but guaranteed-to-be-fun options. I got lots of dismissive hand waving from my fiance and her mother. No, this was a going to be a wedding like all the rest. Fancy entertainment, fancy setting, fancy party favors for all to take home with them. Must impress the guests.
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And lots of stress leading up to the magical day. Thirteen years later she was still interfering and suggesting the way things had to be for her daughter. Spend, spend, spend. More things is the key to happiness. After years of marriage, it broke down. M-I-L came to my house to read me the riot act and suggest that it was time we got divorced. The fact that I wanted to save my money, quit my job and start up my dream business with my savings was too much for them to bear. And have her support the whole family on her income alone for a year? I think people have it all wrong about weddings.
When you make it 25 years, throw another party. Celebrate the accomplishments that mean something. I make quite a bit of money. As someone who has happily lived with her beloved partner for 15 years, I feel obligated to ask this question. And this is direct family, not distant. So either you make it immediate family only, or you are picking and choosing who gets invited, and feelings will get hurt. We got married in the Caribbean St. Thomas in a villa on the top of a mountain, overlooking the island and ocean. For us it did not make sense to get married locally and spend 10 — 15 thousand dollars.
Ugh, this is why I hate wedding posts on finance blogs. Sorry, rant over.
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After that I am for more economy. Conde Nast Bridal Group who have an interest in driving up spending on weddings.
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Anybody can throw money at the bridal industry and have a fairy-tale party. Are you actually a fairy princess? Do you wear a tiara to work to show how glamorous you are?
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Then why do you think you should even enjoy a wedding straight out of a Disney movie. Grow up and express your own tastes. We found a hall that had just been remodeled and needed the bookings. Our caterer was a non-profit that trained women from shelters in restaurant job skills. We had a sleek, modern look which kept cost down on decorations. Tasteful calla lily accents are cheaper than throwing roses everywhere.
We made our own centerpieces, favors, and invitations. I even took an art class before hand just for this purpose, and it was money well spent. Everything about the day came from our hearts, not our wallets. Our wedding had beautiful surroundings, great food, dancing, music, and the love of our friends and family. In my mind the actual day is such a blur that I hardly remember it, but people still tell us it was the best wedding they ever attended. I agree that planning for a wedding is more realistic than cutting it down. And on the evening before my wedding day I have other things to do besides playing with flowers.
We did cut back where we could and preferred simple and elegant. For example, we paid a little more for our reception hall but it was the lobby of a concert hall with a rich Italian Rococo architecture. Yes, you read that right. I can honestly say that it was the most fun night I ever had in my life.
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What a complete waste of money to spend 28k on one day! What about saving that money for the rest of your life? We took what we would have spent on the wedding and put it in the bank. Guess what- we paid off our mortgage last December. I'm all about the minister getting paid for his time, but don't say it's the same level. She did the same kind of things to a lot of her friends and family ie: asking all the wedding party who was coming from far away to pay for individual hotel rooms at the inn it was held at to make sure all the really expensive rooms were taken, as required by her contract.
Now every time I hear her brag about how she had the most awesome wedding ever on a super-low budget, all I can think about is how she did it by taking advantage of people she knows.
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We had an early wedding with reception brunch to save cost on food. Was it the perfect wedding? In a word, NO. I screwed up my vows and the maid of honor screwed up her toast. Some of the food was too dry. It was by no means perfect. Why does the government need to be involved in my relationship? Marriage is a government contract that says I will lose half my net worth if she decides to shack up with her personal trainer instead. Wow what a deal! Except that in some jurisdictions the same property settlement rules apply whether you were married or living together.
I like that you wrote a sample savings guide for weddings. It is a relevant point that a lot of the big spenders are getting some parental help.
You do not need one to get married. You WANT one. I have been to black-tie, all-out, red-rose petals-on-the-floor insanity weddings.
source url You know what? And they will stay with you hopefully for the rest of your life. What more does one need? Fine, that makes perfect reasonable sense. However, I think […]. Not everyone is a hypocrite. We did go the simple route- we had one attendant each, and one flower girl. While we had a harpist for the ceremony, a friend offered to dj for the reception. We also put together our favors. So, not only is it possible to have an inexpensive wedding, people really do have them, perhaps more often than you think. So, I cosign KM. They planned their wedding at our alma mater and the cost was puny.
The total cost will be below Bridesmaids-thrift stores! Little bro already had a suit, dad has a suit. Nice, paper and plastic ones. Pretty, but affordable. Cake-a friend is giving one to us as a gift. If they had not, I would have opted to make one myself. Not that hard. We might spend more. I HATE it when people spend too much on their weddings and then complain about it or go into debt because of it :-O. Your post is very insightful. There are many people who want to have their dream wedding and go broke, and then there are those who actually plan for their dream wedding accordingly — they do the math and plan it well.
Dude, this post totally freaked me out. Almost as scary as having a wedding dress waiting in the closet. I think this is one thing that can wait a little while longer for me. But thanks for bringing it to my attention, Ramit! Ramit is totally correct in this instance. The truth is you either save and pay or elope.